Love of my Life

Like most couples, Ammon and I had a 'song'. Ours didn't come about randomly, it was a song we chose intentionally because it spoke to us. In those heady first months of marriage, it personified our emotions for each other. I will always carry around the mental image of Ammon, standing in the kitchen of our first apartment while I sit in our bedroom and watch him--singing this song to me. He knew all the words by heart, and sang with such passion and devotion that it nearly moved me to tears. Even today, when I hear that song, I picture him in basketball shorts and a t-shirt, in the middle of the night--singing to me with all his heart.

Love of my Life
Jim Brickman

I am amazed
When i look at you
I see you smiling back at me
It's like all my dreams come true
I am afraid
If i lost you girl
I'd fall through the cracks
And lose me track in this crazy lonely world

Sometimes it's so hard to believe
When the nights can be so long
And gave me the strength
And kept me holding on

Chorus
You are the love of my life
And I'm so glad you found me
You are the love of my life
Baby put your arms around me
I guess this is how it feels
When you finally find something real
My angel in the night
You are my love
The love of my life

Now here you are
With midnight closing in
You take my hand as our shadows dance
With moonlite on you skin
I look in your eyes
I'm lost inside your kiss
I think if I'd never met you
About all the things I'd miss

sometimes it's so hard to believe
when a love can be so strong
and faith gave me the strength
and kept me holding on
You are the love of my life
And I'm so glad you found me

You are the love of my life
Baby put your arms around me
I guess this is how it feels
When you finally find something real
My angel in the night
You are my love
The love of my life

Over the years, this song became more Ammon's song to me, rather than 'our song'. I had a song for him, too. One that fit my emotions and feelings for him more appropriately than this piece--but always, this song will hold a special place in my heart.

When it came time to choose the music to be played at Ammon's viewing, this song was a clear choice. It tore my heart out every time I heard the opening strains that night, as it played over and over on an endless loop along with three other poignant songs, as I pictured him singing to me. I still picture Ammon singing me that song, and I know that he meant every word. Over the years, we slow-danced in the living room, in the kitchen, and in our bedroom to the strains of that song. I bought the sheet music several years ago, before I even own a piano.

Some days, I'm not strong enough to listen to this song, or my song for him. Today, I am feeling strong enough, and the picture in my head is more vibrant than ever.

I miss you, babe. You are the love of my life.