Hypo

For the last several months, I have been feeling more crappy than usual. I haven't slept much or gone to bed early enough since Ammon died, but I was managing fine. I could get out of bed when the kids got up in the morning and complete the things that needed to be done during the day with normal levels of exhaustion. Starting in about December, though, things got worse. At first I chalked it up to the holidays, and the shock and fog of grief lifting slightly. Then, I chalked it up to a demanding school schedule and my amped-up workouts that started in December. In February, I could no longer shrug off the symptoms. I was experiencing low energy, extreme exhaustion, acne, inexplicable weight stability given my level of activity, and an extreme sensitivity to cold temperature. I'm no fool. When I finally analyzed the symptoms, I was certain that my thyroid gland had once again become under-active. I called our family doctor and requested the appropriate bloodwork, and within a week the results were in and the appropriate medication was prescribed. Now, I've never been a fan of medication of any sort. Ammon used to implore me on a regular basis to treat regular aches and pains and the symptoms of the common cold with the myriad of chemicals I store in my closet. More often than not, though, I would agree to take the medication only to 'never get around to it', and choose to suffer instead. In this instance, I committed to taking the medication at the proper time and in the proper way every day. Within about 10 days, I began to notice a difference. Now, at two weeks later, I have noticed a tremendous difference in my life. My energy level has shot through the roof--finally the effects of all that exercise is paying off! I move through each day with purpose and a sense of accomplishment that I haven't felt in almost a year. I noticed that as the months since December have gone by, my house has gotten progressively more messy. I became more and more willing to let small tasks go undone, and then became willing to let larger tasks go undone. In the past week, I have noticed my housework return to it's normal state, or near to it. I'm able to stay more focused on my schoolwork, to feel energized in my faith, and more attuned and attentive to my children. Already, I feel like there is weight slipping from my body. I intend to weigh myself next week while I'm at the gym, but it doesn't matter what the scale says. My clothes fit better, I FEEL better, and I know in my heart that even if I don't LOOK better, my feelings will transmit through that swagger in my hips. I'm thrilled with that knowledge.

I am so unbelievably grateful that in this modern day I have the option of treating this hormone problem. I'm so grateful that I don't have to move sluggishly throughout my days anymore. Today, after I got home from the gym I was sitting on the couch snuggling the baby, and it occurred to me that I would like to go jogging. Normally, I wouldn't consider getting an extra workout in a day. Today I knew without a doubt that I could manage to run at least a mile without stopping, and likely be able to push Brooklyn in the stroller without any added difficulty. My next task is to find a suitable park where the kids can play while I jog. I have no desire to jog on a treadmill at the gym. I want to feel the wind in my air and the pavement under my feet--I can't wait!