First Christmas

It is nearly Christmas day, on our first Christmas without Ammon. There are no words to describe how I feel right now, so I won't even try. Perhaps later, when the emotions aren't as fresh and raw. Perhaps never.

In the meantime, Angela sent me this poem a couple weeks ago. I have been saving it for tonight. It brings tears to my eyes every time I read it.

My First Christmas in Heaven
I see the countless Christmas trees around the world below.
With tiny lights like heavens stars reflecting in the snow.
The sight is so spectacular; please wipe away that tear,
For I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.
I hear the many Christmas songs, that people hold so dear,
But the sounds of music can’t compare with the Christmas choir up here.
I have no words to tell you the joy their voices bring.
For it is beyond description to hear the angels sing.

I know how much you miss me;
I see the pain in your heart.
But I am not so far away, we really aren’t apart.
So be happy for me dear ones, you know I hold you dear.
And be glad I’m spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.
I send you each a special gift, more precious than gold.
I send you each a memory of my undying love.
After all “Love” is the gift more precious than pure gold.
It was the most important in the stories Jesus told.
Please love and keep each other, as my Father said to do.
For I can’t count the blessing or love he has for each of you.
So have a Merry Christmas and wipe away the tear,
Remember I’m spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.